Maine news, sports, weather from Waterville Morning Sentinel

March 12

Family grieves for oldest American, 114

By Erin Rhoda erhoda@mainetoday.com
Staff Writer

MADISON -- After living nearly 115 years, through three centuries, two world wars, 21 presidents and all seven Red Sox World Series titles, Mary Josephine Ray found her final resting place Thursday in Madison.

About 40 friends and relatives, the latter representing four generations, gathered at St. Sebastian Catholic Church on Main Street late Thursday morning to celebrate the life of the woman who, until Sunday, was the oldest person in the United States.

Ray, who grew up in Westbrook and then lived in Anson and Madison for about 60 years, died around midnight Sunday in a nursing home in Westmoreland, N.H., at the age of 114 years, 294 days. She was the oldest person in the United States and the second-oldest in the world, according to the Gerontology Research Group.

After the closed-casket funeral Mass, family and friends gathered behind the church in the sun to talk.

Rodney Mitchell, a former neighbor of the Rays in Madison, had not seen the Ray family in 40 years.

Frances Spaulding of Skowhegan, wearing a round blue hat, remained by the side of Mary Ray's daughter-in-law, Barbara Ray, saying they have been friends for about 80 years.

Some people cried. Many people gave hugs.

Despite her age, Ray's death was unexpected, said her 59-year-old granddaughter, Katherine Ray. Although she had been quieter and ate less the week before her death, she was not sick and had been planning her 115th birthday party. She died in her sleep.

Katherine Ray said her grandmother was vivacious, even in old age. She could touch her toes at age 100 and liked to arm-wrestle. She ate anything she wanted and did not exercise. She loved the Red Sox.

She said she remembers her grandmother's physical strength the most, how she would grab her hand and pull her toward her. "She never spoke of dying," she said. "If anyone asked her, she said, 'I'm going to live forever.' She had no conception of dying. She lived right for the present."

She lived independently until age 102, when family members tried to convince her to move to a nursing home. She refused, but one day she asked Katherine Ray whether there were men at the nursing home.

"I said, 'Yes,' so she went into her room and came out with a wig and said, 'How do I look?' " Katherine Ray recalled.

Ray loved to sing, she said. Some of her favorite songs were "Come Josephine in my Flying Machine," published in 1910; "Take Me Out to the Ball Game," written in 1908; and "My Name is Morgan But It Ain't J.P.," published in 1906.

Ray was born May 17, 1895, in Bloomfield, Prince Edward Island. She moved to Westbrook at age 3, for reasons that concerned her father's health, Katherine Ray said. Her father died when she was 7, and her mother died when she was 15.

She then worked on her own as a housekeeper and store clerk. She lost touch with her three brothers and two sisters, Joseph, Edmund, Frank, Agnus and Celina Arsenault, as they found work elsewhere or got married. There were few phones, and traveling was difficult back then, Katherine Ray said.

She married Walter H. Ray in 1923, and they lived in Anson and then Madison for about 60 years. Her husband owned Walter Ray's General Store, which was in Anson, across from the Town Hall. An insurance agency stands there now.

"I know she loved Maine," Katherine Ray said, describing her as a stay-at-home mother who took care of her two sons, Robert and Donald. She enjoyed her flower garden and card games, she said.

At age 72, following the death of her husband in 1967, Ray moved to Florida, where she and her husband often had spent winters. At 80, she moved to Massachusetts. At age 102, she became a resident of the Maplewood Nursing Home in Westmoreland, N.H.

Katherine Ray saw her grandmother a few hours before she died. "She looked peaceful, actually. She was just sleeping," she said.

Survivors include two sons, eight grandchildren, 13 great-grandchildren and five great-great-grandchildren, according to her obituary. She will be buried in the spring in Forest Hill Cemetery in Madison, next to her husband.

Erin Rhoda -- 474-9534

erhoda@centralmaine.com